Hufflepuff
6th Year
91
posts
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They don't call me Mr. Greenside for no reason.
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Post by Llewellyn Ludlow on Jun 11, 2016 16:36:05 GMT -5
The sudden change in his demeanor startled the Hufflepuff. Letting his hand fall, his expression followed a analogously, diverting his green eyes down to his untied shoes. They were glassy, and for a moment Llewellyn looked like he might have cried, but it could have just been the smokey haze that surrounded the boy. In truth, he'd begun sweating and his heart pounded wildly. He didn't deal well with confrontation, and he especially didn't like when people were mad at him. As much as he'd like to pretend that the opinions of others rolled right off his angsty sixteen year old shoulders, they actually meant a lot.
But it had been a pretty stupid thing to say, hadn't it? He was so accustomed to chatting idly that he rarely thought much before he spoke. Llewellyn just kind of let whatever mind vomit he had dribble out of his mouth. He opened his mouth and looked again at Lachlan beneath the blue light.
"Um. Sorry," he apologized genuinely, cheeks flushing over. "M..." he struggled, turning inwards on himself now. Whatever friendly mien he held previously was gone, replaced with an anxiety ridden teen that couldn't even speak properly. "My dad's a rich asshole. I don't know anything about your parents. I'm- I'm sure they're great people. I just say stupid shit."
His words trailed off. He shuffled his feet and watched them in the snow, too nervous to make eye contact again.
"I'm gonna go."
Mostly because everything in his body was telling him to run away, like it always did. Turning around, he started down the empty Hogsmeade street.
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Slytherin
6th Year
207
posts
95
likes
in an isolated system entropy can only increase
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Post by Lachlan Strangways on Jun 11, 2016 18:41:00 GMT -5
And Lachlan was left standing in the snow, along with the impulse to catch up to Llewellyn and tell him it was okay. But no, it wasn't okay. You didn't say things like that about other people's families, no matter how accurate it might be. That was the thing. So why did he feel guilty?
"Wait up," he called, jogging after the Hufflepuff. "I'm sorry I blew up at you."
"They're not great people," he said. The words felt weird coming out of his mouth, for although he'd called his parents much worse things, during screaming matches or just in conversation with his siblings, those things had just been trite insults to hurt or express frustration. Saying it whilst calm made it more real.
"But, like, rich arseholes doesn't even begin to cover it, either."
"I'm not defending them. It's more like, unless you know how completely fucked up they are, just... don't," he tried to explain.
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Hufflepuff
6th Year
91
posts
101
likes
They don't call me Mr. Greenside for no reason.
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Post by Llewellyn Ludlow on Jun 13, 2016 0:22:56 GMT -5
Stopped in his tracks, Llewellyn searched Lachlan's expression as he spoke. He was pretty perplexed if he were being honest with himself, not entirely certain what to expect from the Slytherin boy as he tentatively tried to explain himself. After all, he had turned on him so suddenly, and that was not something Llewellyn was accustomed to dealing with. On the flip side, dealing with someone like himself, Llewellyn had come to understand required a bit (see also: a lot) of patience. It was a quality that many lacked, so Llewellyn was rather accustomed to being ousted.
Finally, he raised a hand and waved it a little, gently swaying his head from side to side.
"You don't have to explain or apologize, unless you want to of course, but I'm pretty shit at talking about things too. Some things are just too tough."
It was true. Everyone had some kind of story. Some stories were just happier than others, and most people had no taste for tragedies.
"My doctor has this quote up on her wall. It says 'our wounds are often the openings into the best and most beautiful part of us'. I forget who it's by. I think it's pretty creepy to be perfectly honest with you, but I think some people are probably into it," he said with a nervous shrug.
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Slytherin
6th Year
207
posts
95
likes
in an isolated system entropy can only increase
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Post by Lachlan Strangways on Jun 13, 2016 1:04:12 GMT -5
"Ugh," Lachlan snorted, "inspirational quotes."
He smiled conspiratorially.
"We should go into the Forest, and find something small and cute - like a rabbit or something - and blast a hole through its kidneys and you can give her a photograph."
"Show her what 'the most beautiful part of us' actually looks like."
Lachlan blinked, laughed, and turned up the path toward the castle.
"Or, you know, not."
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Hufflepuff
6th Year
91
posts
101
likes
They don't call me Mr. Greenside for no reason.
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Post by Llewellyn Ludlow on Jun 15, 2016 21:21:48 GMT -5
...There was something a bit off with Lachlan, wasn't there? As his lips parted in surprise by his joke Llewellyn pushed the thought to the back of his mind, barricading it beneath repressed childhood memories and the series of embarrassments that had been his teenage career. Besides, how could he judge anyone? Llewellyn was just as much of a mess as anyone else, doing things that often seemed irrational and wholly unnecessary and kind of shitty, if we're being honest with oneself. But on that same note, Llewellyn was actually quite fond of animals, all animals, especially the cute variety, and a series of red flags were firing off as he tried to recall every psychology pamphlet he'd read in his doctor's waiting room. It wasn't very funny, though Llewellyn was by no means a comedian himself, but not even unfunny in a lame sort of way. It was fucked up.
Maybe it was revenge for his earlier comment. Was the guy trying to bug him out on purpose?
In an attempt to hide his mortified expression he replied with a nervous chuckle, taking one last long drag on his spliff before dropping the roach into the snow.
"I can't blast myself out of a paper bag, let alone a moving target," he responded lazily, his head swimming in smoke amidst his I-can't-tell-if-It's-Because-I'm-High-Or-If-This-Guy-Is-Just-Kindof-Weird freakout. You know, the kind where you felt extra conscious of your hands even though they felt sort of numb, and you wanted to be anywhere but where you were in that very moment. His bed sounded great, buried beneath more blankets than he could count and maybe a grilled cheese to accompany him.
"I don't think I could even conjure a blast. I've never really tried to be fair... Not really my thing," he continued, following Lachlan's resolve towards the castle. "Hey, could I get a swig?" he asked, motioning towards the bottle Lachlan carried with him. "Cotton mouth."
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Slytherin
6th Year
207
posts
95
likes
in an isolated system entropy can only increase
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Post by Lachlan Strangways on Jun 16, 2016 17:10:47 GMT -5
"Wasn't thinking of a moving target," Lachlan replied, handing the bottle over. "Wouldn't work if it was moving, anyhow. Prob'ly wouldn't be enough left for a photo."
"Naaah," he gazed up at the sky, was it just him or did everything seem clearer in the wintertime? "It'd be cruel not to put it down first. No reason to make poor bunny suffer just to freak out your therapist."
He looked slyly at Llewellyn.
"You didn't think I'd realise you were talking 'bout a therapist, huh?"
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Hufflepuff
6th Year
91
posts
101
likes
They don't call me Mr. Greenside for no reason.
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Post by Llewellyn Ludlow on Jun 20, 2016 19:12:38 GMT -5
Llewellyn brought the bottle to his lips but then paused when Lachlan spoke. He lowered it again, green eyes darting towards the boy with a speechless awe knitting itself across his dark raised eyebrows. Suddenly, he got it. Lachlan was taking a piss at his expense. Needless to say Llewellyn felt a little bit silly for his panic and relaxed before taking a hearty gulp of wine, wetting his arid mouth. Lowering the bottle again, he passed it back towards the snake.
Well, it wasn't like he didn't deserve it. Unlike Lachlan, he didn't capsize at the revelation. Rather, he just sort of shrugged his shoulders and shoved his hands in his pockets again.
"Didn't think therapists were a thing with wizards," he said a bit sheepishly before continuing. "I uhm... I don't have those kind of problems though. I actually really like animals," he admitted honestly. It was a straightforward explanation but still vague enough to leave quite a bit unexplained. He had perhaps underestimated Lachlan's knowledge of muggle culture and now felt a bit foolish for doing so.
"It's kind of like your family. It's not not something I talk about."
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Slytherin
6th Year
207
posts
95
likes
in an isolated system entropy can only increase
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Post by Lachlan Strangways on Jun 22, 2016 6:58:10 GMT -5
Lachlan snorted. He'd just been winding Llewellyn up about having a therapist, not implying that.
"Didn't think you did," he said. "I live on a farm, mate. Animals are nice an' that, but y' can't get attached cos they're gonna end up on someone's plate one day."
He tried to swirl the bottle before taking a swig himself.
"I have a specialist," he volunteered.
Lachlan hadn't drunk enough yet to not know what he was saying, but he had drunk enough to not care so much about what came out his mouth.
"Probably need a therapist, though."
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Hufflepuff
6th Year
91
posts
101
likes
They don't call me Mr. Greenside for no reason.
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Post by Llewellyn Ludlow on Jul 4, 2016 20:40:44 GMT -5
Llewellyn looked a little ill at the mention of animals on a plate. He liked eating them, but he wasn't particularly fond of the idea of them being living breathing creatures. There was that entitled disconnect there that forced the idea of the two being one in the same out of his curly-headed idealistic mind. The truth was, Llewellyn was as spoiled as they came, but often vehemently rejected the notion that he came from money. Likewise, he had a habit of rejecting the things he simply disliked, like a disillusioned child. There was an aspect of immaturity to his nature that made itself apparent in subtle ways.
In this instance, it was one of those ways.
"I just have a lot of anxiety is all," he stammered the explanation quickly, trying his best not to sound too contentious or to give too much away. It was a private matter. One he didn't even share with his closest of friends, and one he definitely was not fond of dwelling upon. It was just so much easier to pretend ones problems simply did not exist.
He also wasn't sure what specialist applied to, but he wasn't entirely sure he even wanted to know. However, he didn't easily hide his confusion as he tried to work out what, exactly, a specialist might have been specializing in. However, after Lachlan's outburst he was a little afraid to ask. So Llewellyn did exactly what he did best, and chose to ignore the comment, sticking his tongue out instead and catching several snowflakes.
Distracted by his apparent interested in the weather, he'd hardly noticed the castle sneaking up before them. He supposed time passed quickly in good company...? Or something like that. Offering a curt wave to Lachlan he hopped his way up the castle steps.
"Anyways, I'll see you later. Thanks for keeping me company dude," he bid his farewell with a grin before disappearing between the large double doors.
~outtie
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