Post by Kaimana Ohme on Nov 13, 2016 5:28:36 GMT -5
hi friends............. critter & i's old site had a thing called Write Drunk, Edit Sober, to quote the late Peter De Vries-- not 2 be confused w/ the misquote of ernest hemingway, whom was a drunk (allgedly), and also i would nevr quote him
the point was to write drunk and eidt sober, shocking i kno, but we literally never edited it so i'm retitling this for what it actually is: let's all get drunk and write fanfics for eahc other
TO recap if this makes any sense: I am drunk and I will be writing some hot WTF fanfic 4 u guys, and you guys can use this thread 2 do the same~
bc Critter and I were talking about this and i joked id write her something she asked me to do with a few days ago??? a week??? i don't know time??? i will be writing ehr a thing for um
well i guess the obvious choice is Llewellyn Ludlow / Kaimana Ohme so let's go!!!!!!!!!!!!! let's do this!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (special meantion of Dale Roberts & Tobias Åstrōm )
also, Dub gave me a topic: beach volleyball, so there's that too
anyway so like....... tw kinda raunchy??? a lil bit nsfw text?? but not sexy, don't worry it is not sexy at all
Kai was like chillin at a beach grill, one of those places that's liek? a bar that serves food but it's open and on the beach? sand is there. it gets up in there. so you gotta have like baskets to eat your food in? typically it's awful burgers and a LOT of alcohol. im from southwest florida i know what im talking about? so he's eating an awful burger but it's #vgean so it's at least GOOD for him? and he's liek? "maybe i should ask these ppl if they use the same friar w/ their fries and fried chicken?" but instead he like cobbles it all down bc kai doesnt give a shit about anything but Havin' Fun Havin' A Good Time and so that's that
Llewellyn. that awful bas&*atard. That awful mopheaded FUCK. he shows up, and like? SEES Kai and is like "): i ahve such a bone r right npow ): i hate my dad and i luv dick n i luv crying" -- Llewellyn Ludlow, circa 2050. so he sits next to kai, and the ghost of tobias (rip, 4ever in our hearts) screams in the distance, but they can't hear him bc there's too much Post-Tropical Sadcore playing over the speakers looped over each other in a really sick harsh noise kinda way but it's like deafening loud. i accidentally deleted a section here and i dont remember what ti said other than "is this world building?" well? is it?). howeevr llewellyn's lil bitch voice is the perfect pitch to talk over the music, and he approaches Kai in a very ezra koening going in for the kill but w/ awkward teenage boy flare as u'd probably actually expect anyway-esque way, sits down right next to that lil twunk and is like "hey sup"
kai's like "hey sup (;" and takes a bite of his leaf and llewellyn IMMEDIATELY comes in his board shorts and kai IGNORES him. llewellyn is so far off his radar. kai's radar is literally a tiny lil WWII radar that only detects, actually, not submarines but Gnarly Waves which? incidentally? no man is a gnarly wave? like kai can romantciize it all he wants but sorry. so anyway im saying and ive been implying 4 centuries that Kai is in the ace spectrum but no one stops to ask but that's ok
llewellyn has a 09423809328094 paragraph long introspection on how kai's wink is a betrayal bc it wasn't followed by him coming up with names for their future children, solidfying Reagan, Bacon, and Lil Jon as their future kin & also their marriage. (i love llewellyn's billions of introspections i love him i love llewellyn if you ever ask me if i loved a man id say llewellyn but really i mean critter that's the secret that's the implication i love critter)
anyway
"let's play volleyball" llewellyn says, and kai nods at least 10 times in a quick succession (j had 2 autocorrect that one bc i couldnt think of how u spell in-- i lied.......... i edited a thing......... im a sham). kai's like "im gonna punt that volleyball so hard into ur face u'll wish it's grass" because he's reached that point in his life where he's the jaded weed dealer he's meant to be, god bless, i'd like to thank every1 for helping me ruin my nicest character. id like 2 thank tobias esp bc he was wonderfully awful and posisbly the worst relationship ive ever dragged him throygh THANKS
llewellyn prays a lil bit bc he's so in love w/ this and loves to be treated poorly, he's a bad boy (;, and they run off to the tune of Crimewave by HEALTH, which is good it's a good song and they play volleyball with an assortment of boyz. Boyz like............................... uh.............................. Dale.............................. Dale is there. He's on Llewellyn's team because Kai actually knows how to play volleyball while I'm just gonan guess these two dweebs arent great at it no offense dweebs. Guys? I don't even know what a boy is
Kai smacks the balls into Llewellyn's face like? 20 times at least. and Llewellyn loved it at first? like? he was tweeting like "i think he's finally going 2 ask me out" and "have u ever been in love?" but then after the like? 13th time he realized it was actually kinda not great and started getting really bitter and did that thing where he Whined. I'm realizing right now that Llewellyn as a charatcer is someone I could never write because he's so unique to Critter. My parody: He whined, thought about pengis a lot. The end.
Kai meanwhile liek................................. cried a lil bit and ate some sand, that was his side dish......... he remembers wispfully the days where he could 420 blaze it in his room and daniyah was 2 hyears old and stupid af so he didnt have to worry........... sisters am i right? i dont have any but im sure it's subjective
they thought about kissing but neither critter nor i allowed it, not yet at least, they gotta wait another 5435 years for the hot smuts aka a 3 second closed mouth kiss u//////////u maybe hand holding? u/////////////////////////u
someone ese was there and they also wished theyd all kiss but instead they started playing volleyball again, and Llewellyn got suplexed at one point? wrestle tennis. tennis wrestling. i mean volleyball* im thinking about tennis why
i cant do this ?????????????????????????????????ENJOY
the point was to write drunk and eidt sober, shocking i kno, but we literally never edited it so i'm retitling this for what it actually is: let's all get drunk and write fanfics for eahc other
TO recap if this makes any sense: I am drunk and I will be writing some hot WTF fanfic 4 u guys, and you guys can use this thread 2 do the same~
bc Critter and I were talking about this and i joked id write her something she asked me to do with a few days ago??? a week??? i don't know time??? i will be writing ehr a thing for um
well i guess the obvious choice is Llewellyn Ludlow / Kaimana Ohme so let's go!!!!!!!!!!!!! let's do this!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (special meantion of Dale Roberts & Tobias Åstrōm )
also, Dub gave me a topic: beach volleyball, so there's that too
anyway so like....... tw kinda raunchy??? a lil bit nsfw text?? but not sexy, don't worry it is not sexy at all
Kai was like chillin at a beach grill, one of those places that's liek? a bar that serves food but it's open and on the beach? sand is there. it gets up in there. so you gotta have like baskets to eat your food in? typically it's awful burgers and a LOT of alcohol. im from southwest florida i know what im talking about? so he's eating an awful burger but it's #vgean so it's at least GOOD for him? and he's liek? "maybe i should ask these ppl if they use the same friar w/ their fries and fried chicken?" but instead he like cobbles it all down bc kai doesnt give a shit about anything but Havin' Fun Havin' A Good Time and so that's that
Llewellyn. that awful bas&*atard. That awful mopheaded FUCK. he shows up, and like? SEES Kai and is like "): i ahve such a bone r right npow ): i hate my dad and i luv dick n i luv crying" -- Llewellyn Ludlow, circa 2050. so he sits next to kai, and the ghost of tobias (rip, 4ever in our hearts) screams in the distance, but they can't hear him bc there's too much Post-Tropical Sadcore playing over the speakers looped over each other in a really sick harsh noise kinda way but it's like deafening loud. i accidentally deleted a section here and i dont remember what ti said other than "is this world building?" well? is it?). howeevr llewellyn's lil bitch voice is the perfect pitch to talk over the music, and he approaches Kai in a very ezra koening going in for the kill but w/ awkward teenage boy flare as u'd probably actually expect anyway-esque way, sits down right next to that lil twunk and is like "hey sup"
kai's like "hey sup (;" and takes a bite of his leaf and llewellyn IMMEDIATELY comes in his board shorts and kai IGNORES him. llewellyn is so far off his radar. kai's radar is literally a tiny lil WWII radar that only detects, actually, not submarines but Gnarly Waves which? incidentally? no man is a gnarly wave? like kai can romantciize it all he wants but sorry. so anyway im saying and ive been implying 4 centuries that Kai is in the ace spectrum but no one stops to ask but that's ok
llewellyn has a 09423809328094 paragraph long introspection on how kai's wink is a betrayal bc it wasn't followed by him coming up with names for their future children, solidfying Reagan, Bacon, and Lil Jon as their future kin & also their marriage. (i love llewellyn's billions of introspections i love him i love llewellyn if you ever ask me if i loved a man id say llewellyn but really i mean critter that's the secret that's the implication i love critter)
anyway
"let's play volleyball" llewellyn says, and kai nods at least 10 times in a quick succession (j had 2 autocorrect that one bc i couldnt think of how u spell in-- i lied.......... i edited a thing......... im a sham). kai's like "im gonna punt that volleyball so hard into ur face u'll wish it's grass" because he's reached that point in his life where he's the jaded weed dealer he's meant to be, god bless, i'd like to thank every1 for helping me ruin my nicest character. id like 2 thank tobias esp bc he was wonderfully awful and posisbly the worst relationship ive ever dragged him throygh THANKS
llewellyn prays a lil bit bc he's so in love w/ this and loves to be treated poorly, he's a bad boy (;, and they run off to the tune of Crimewave by HEALTH, which is good it's a good song and they play volleyball with an assortment of boyz. Boyz like............................... uh.............................. Dale.............................. Dale is there. He's on Llewellyn's team because Kai actually knows how to play volleyball while I'm just gonan guess these two dweebs arent great at it no offense dweebs. Guys? I don't even know what a boy is
Kai smacks the balls into Llewellyn's face like? 20 times at least. and Llewellyn loved it at first? like? he was tweeting like "i think he's finally going 2 ask me out" and "have u ever been in love?" but then after the like? 13th time he realized it was actually kinda not great and started getting really bitter and did that thing where he Whined. I'm realizing right now that Llewellyn as a charatcer is someone I could never write because he's so unique to Critter. My parody: He whined, thought about pengis a lot. The end.
Kai meanwhile liek................................. cried a lil bit and ate some sand, that was his side dish......... he remembers wispfully the days where he could 420 blaze it in his room and daniyah was 2 hyears old and stupid af so he didnt have to worry........... sisters am i right? i dont have any but im sure it's subjective
they thought about kissing but neither critter nor i allowed it, not yet at least, they gotta wait another 5435 years for the hot smuts aka a 3 second closed mouth kiss u//////////u maybe hand holding? u/////////////////////////u
someone ese was there and they also wished theyd all kiss but instead they started playing volleyball again, and Llewellyn got suplexed at one point? wrestle tennis. tennis wrestling. i mean volleyball* im thinking about tennis why
i cant do this ?????????????????????????????????ENJOY